You know, as hard as this decision was, I really wouldn't have it any other way. When I was in that room at Abrazo, I cried a little bit before they brought the papers out. I was talking to Pamela and I had asked her why was it so hard if it was the right thing to do. Why would something I knew in my heart was the best be so painful? Then I realized, the pain I felt was the overwhelming love for my son, and that the decision was for the best and was right, and it seemed like that was all I needed to dry up my tears, and I signed those papers with a smile on my face. I guess it's because I know it's right and thats why it puts me at ease. It sounds dumb when I write it, but it's hard to explain. People tell you all the
time, "Everything's going to be just fine." But no one ever really knows that for sure, only this time it was certain. The only time I knew it was really was going to be okay. And that is what puts me at peace. I cry still, almost every night, but it's not sadness or grief, believe it or not, it's of happiness and appreciation. Julie told me while we were at the hospital that I had saved his life. And in a way, yes I did. But to me, they are the ones who saved his life. Sure, he would be alive, but his life would be empty, unfulfilling. The reason being, if I had not been paired with Julie and Jonathan, I would not have placed him. I truly did not want any of those other people to parent my son. I would have ended up keeping him and I would never have been able to give him the life he deserves. Jonathan and Julie can give all the love I can, along with all the care I can't. With them, he is truly safe and loved. He will grow up knowing how much everyone loves him, what a gift he truly is, and he will be happy. And for that, I can not thank them enough. I thank them for giving my son, OUR son, the life he deserves and all the love a mother and a father can give him. I also thank them(and their wonderful families) for making me so much a part of their family as Jack is. I couldn't be happier.
27 comments:
What a sweet and mature attitude you have about Jack. I am so glad that you love Jack and that you love Julie and Jonathan enough to trust your son to him. You have made them and the rest of the family so happy. You will always be a loving part of our family. May God bless you!
(Julie's) Grandma & Grandpa
You are a very strong young woman. I fully believe that God placed you and Jonathan & Julie together. You have chosen THE BEST people to raise your son! (BTW, he is BEAUTIFUL!!) I have been praying for you this entire journey and will continue to do so! You are a blessing to the Davis family and to me!
Hey Jessika, I haven't written to you before but I have been praying and praying for you. Jack is beautiful and is very blessed that you chose to give him life and to make plans for him that you feel were best. That is such a selfless choice to make and I admire you for that! I'm so glad that God has given you peace about the whole situation and I pray that He will continue to be right there with you in all you do in life!
I'm such a proud new aunt! My babies are both adopted and my oldest (2 1/2) thinks it is "very cool" to have an adopted cousin now! She also said, "baby Jack cute" and she can't wait to meet him, neither can the rest of us!
We will continue to keep you in our prayers!
Christy (Jonathan and Julie's sister-in-law)
Your son Jack is beautiful and is a lucky little boy to be surrounded by so many people who love him very much. What a wonderful gift you, Julie and Jonathan have given to this little boy. Blessings to all of you.
The Steadman Family (3x5 orientation w/ Julie and Jonathan)
Jessika
I been praying for you throughout your journey. Julie and Jonathan are wonderful people and little Jack will be loved enourmously. You are a very courageous and brave girl. May God bless you. And of course Jack is beautiful!!!
Tara
Dear Jessika,
What a special young woman you are. True love is self-less love, a love that causes you to give even when it hurts. And you have demonstrated true love in a way most of us will never come close to! Jack will always know his Jessika loved him so much, that she gave... It's so much like God's love. He loved us so much that He gave his son....
Jessika, Jack is very blessed to have a birth mother who loves him so much. And he is also very blessed to have parents (Jonathan and Julie) who will also love him sacrificially (they're already giving up sleep to show him that love!!).
Jack will grow up with so much love surrounding him. Thank you for loving him enough to give him life. And for loving him enough to choose parents who would bless him and nurture him.
I may never meet you, but I truly feel love and appreciation for you. Your gift of love is one of the greatest I have ever witnessed. You have blessed all of us who love Julie and Jonathan, and you have blessed Jack most of all. And I know you have blessed the heart of God.
Love,
(Julie's) Aunt Lois
Jessika, My name is Kendall. Jonathan and Julie are friends of ours from church. I just wanted to tell you that I think this is one of the most amazing stories I have ever heard/read. This entire process has been so incredible. I can't begin to tell you the excitement I've had each time I would talk with Julie or receive an email updating everyone. Can't begin to tell you the amount of tears I've cried reading the emails. I know you know this already, but you have blessed Jonathan and Julie so much. Not only with the life of your son, but Your life too. They admire and love you so much. What you have done/are doing is so brave and so giving. I promise to continue to pray for all of you throughout this entire process. And I promise to join with Julie and Jonathan in loving and caring for sweet Jack. He will be surrounded by so much love. From TN~ Kendall Mitchell
Jessika,
Wow. That's all I can say. You are amazing. I pray for you now and have been as you go through this, know you are not alone.
Julie and I were roommates in college and have been friends ever since. I have seen her through many life changes including marrying wonderful Jonathan, moving to different cities and growing in her faith and love. You are such a precious girl to them, so automatically I love you too.
Know that you are blessed and will be continually in our thoughts and prayers in Kentucky. Much love to you and your life, sweet Jessika!!!!
Melissa and TJ Bean
Jessika,
My name is Jim Collins, and I have been a friend of Jonathan and Julie for about 15 years. They honored me by asking that I perform their wedding ceremony. I love these two so deeply, and their happiness brings me great joy.
Thank you for bringing them happiness. I see the glow on their faces as they hold Jack, and my heart swells.
You have been part of a story that is almost too much for words. I can't wait to read the next chapter!
I don't know you, but I love you. Thank you.
Jessika, I have to echo what Aunt Lois and others have said. You gave your best when you gave Jack life and you made the best decision for his life by giving him parents that will love him and be able to provide a wonderful life for him.
I cannot imagine being so brave as you were, making the hard decisions you've had to make, but I have to believe that God lead you to Jon and Julie and that match was made in heaven. Jack is the most blessed little boy to have so many people love him before he ever breathed his first breath of air. His extended family, including all of us who are freinds of Jonathan and Julie, love Jack and feel honored to be a part of your story by being privileged to pray for all of you during this time. God gives the peace that blows your mind away, when the ache and hurt is so strong, lean on Jesus during these times. Thank you Jessika, for such a wonderful and sacrificial gift. God will bless you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Mindy
Dear sweet Jessica, I am Julie's mom and I have been praying for you long before you became pregnant and chose Jonathan and Julie to receive your son. You see, I knew they were considering adoption, and that meant there would have to be young woman willing to give her baby life, and yet willing to give her baby to someone else to raise. So I began to earnestly pray that God would bless that special young woman and bring her together with Julie and Jonathan. You were the answer to my prayers! What a beautiful answer you are! You are now a beloved member of our family and I hope to meet you some day and give you a hug. If I don't get to meet you, I hope to see you in heaven, because I do want to thank you in person for the best gift anyone could ever give. I will continue to pray for you, that God will bless you with much happiness and give you peace, knowing that you have made such a wise and loving decision. You can be sure that Jack will be well-loved and cared for. His life, too, has been and will continue to be bathed in prayer.
To God be the glory -- Great things He has done!!!!!
With deepest gratitude and love,
Joyce
Jessika,
What a beautiful young lady you are with a lovely spirit! Jack is a precious baby boy and you have done an amazing thing sharing him with Julie and Jonathan. Thank you for being such a blessing to Julie and Jonathan!! You have been a blessing to so many others too!!
Your are right, they will love Jack as much as they can love and show him God's love as they parent him.
God amazingly takes care of ALL our needs and every little detail. Trust that HE will continue to do that through this journey.
Many prayers for you and your new family!!!
God Bless,
Patti
There are no words to adequately express our joy, our excitement, our gratitude or our amazement. What a wonderful gift you've given, not only to Jonathan & Julie, but to all of us! We will be eternally grateful for your willingness to share the wonderful gift of Jack with all of us. Thank you for allowing the Lord to use you to make our family more complete. Not only do we have a new nephew & cousin, but we also have a new aunt & sister. You will always be considered a part of our family & we love you very much!
We hope to meet you someday & hug you in our arms. Until then, know that we hug you in our hearts each & every day.
We love you, Jessika!
Matthew, Melanie, Will, Alex & Sophie (Jonathan's older brother & family)
Dear Sweet Jessica,
I have been praying for you as you deal with the overwhelming love you have for your son and the grief you are also experiencing. My son is 3 weeks old today. I know what it feels like to be a new mommy. ( My daughter is 3) My sister had two children before she was married. She raised them on her own with the help of my mother. It was hard. I have always been thankful she gave them life. Thank you for bringing Jack into this world! I can't imagine doing what you have so unselfishly done. You could not have made a better choice. Believe me that your son will be loved by the entire family! Thank you for giving my babies another sweet cousin to enjoy in our family. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. May God continue to bless you and your perfect little boy!
Melanie Davis (Adam's wife)
Check out our blog to see more of the family!
adam-mel.blogspot.com/
Hi Jessica!
My name is Terri and I feel like I know you personally! I was Julie's aide last year and Jonathan taught my daughter Anna Bible at Westminster. We LOVE the Davis family!!! I consider Julie a very close friend! My girls check Julie's Blog about 6 times a day looking for more pictures of that beautiful baby Jack. He is adorable!
You are such a strong person... wise beyond your years. I admire your strength and hope one day that I get to tell you that in person.
Thank you for your gift. You will never know the number of lives you have touched! Between the Davises and the Greens that must be a good hundred! : ) (Not to mention the THOUSAND friends they have!)heehee
I am looking forward to meeting Jack. There is NO doubt that Jack will be loved. Julie and Jonathan are filled with so much love. I know God placed all of y'all together!
Take care and know we will continue to pray for you.
Love, Terri
P.S. I love all the "J"s! Julie, Jonathan, Jack and Jessica (and Jake!)
Jack is so beautiful!! Your letter made me cry! Many blessings to you!!
Jessica,
My wife and I share a bible study with Jonathan and Julie. We've been praying for them to adopt a child for some time and it is awesome to see how precious this whole scenario has played out. I am so amazed at God's goodness to protect you, provide for you all, and give you such a warm and loving spirit for your son. You have made a whole group of people cry, weep, and smile reading your story and seeing such amazing photos of such a precious boy. Two of my boys helped raise money to support this effort and they have cried watching how their efforts have helped you, Jack, and our friends through this special time. Thank you for making such a brave choice and allowing us to love you through the hearts of our friends. You have touched our family.
Mitch Powers
p.s. I was 10 years AF and remember Lackland AFB well:)
Hey, Jessika. I am friends with Julie and Jonny and I just wanted to tell you how impressed I am with you! It is so difficult (even as an adult) to stand up for a decision you know to be right... I am proud of you for doing it! I had an opportunity to be a surrogate mother for some friends of mine (after I already had my own children), and people acted like I was crazy for even thinking of giving up a child. But as you put it, what better gift could you give someone? I know Julie and Jonny love you dearly and you have given them a most precious gift! Hang in there! We are praying for you continually!
Rachel N.
Memphis, TN
Jessika,
I want you to know what a beautiful person you are. Your smile is contagious and your heart is simply amazing. I totally understand why Julie and Jonathan love you so much after getting to spend a week with you here in San Antonio. You are exactly who I expected to meet--an amazing young lady who loves her son beyond words. You have blessed my heart. I count it an honor to spend this time with you!! Much love to you always, Jen
Jessika,
I knew Jonathan and Julie back in their Chicago days, but have been keeping up with this whole situation via e-mail/blogs. I just wanted to tell you how amazing it is that you made this decision - you have given my friends an incredible gift and you obviously have a great deal of love for your son. Thank you for making such a brave sacrifice. I love hearing the story - I usually tear up any time I read Julie's accounts of it all! Thank you.
-Sarah Stone, Houston, TX-
Jessika: My wife and I go to church with Jonathan and Julie, and so we have been keeping up with you and little Jack for the last several months. I want to tell you how blown away we have been by your maturity, warmth, and gracious spirit during all of this. You are without a doubt one of the most special young souls I've ever come across. Thank you so much for your care of Jack and the connection you have made with the Davises. You have made them the happiest folks in the world.
We as a church take vows to care for each others kids, so you can rest assured that Jack will have the best of care, not only from Jonathan and Julie, but from hundreds of other folks who will love and nurture him as well.
Thank you again. God bless.
Jessika,
WOW! So mature at such a young age! You have definitely chosen wisely and have given Jack more than you realize. My husband and I went to college with Julie and Jonathan. I was at their wedding with my mom, who was one of Julie's professors. I can't imagine how difficult all this has been for you. But through it all, I've seen a smile on your face (in pictures) and your words are so eloquent. I will continue to pray for you as you near your 16th birthday. God has BIG plans for you and for Jack. You will never realize the impact you have already made on so many through all this. Blessings to you and your family!
You don't know me, but I've been following your journey through Jonathan and Julie's blog. What you wrote was just beautiful. My husband and I have a son who we adopted from Taiwan; his mom was your age. I can only hope that Reed's mother felt the same way. Thank you for sharing your heart and providing an adopting mother a glimpse into your mind.
Wow, Jessika - you amaze me. You have wisdom beyond your years. I am so happy for you and for Julie. I grew up with Julie and am so happy to see her get to finally be a mommy. Thank you for giving her that gift. God will bless you richly because of your sacrificial love - the kind of agape love He has for you.
Sweet Jessika,
I just echo what everyone else is saying! Your gift of life to Jack and your gift of Jack to Jonny and Julie is such an awesome and beautiful sacrifice. Everyone can clearly see that God has His hand on your life and I know that He has beautiful plans for you!! I have known Julie since she started 1st grade and Jonny since before they got married. Jack couldn't have better parents anywhere on earth. You see, through you, God hand picked Jonny and Julie to be Jack's parents!!! I am still praying that God will wrap His arms around you during the times that you miss little Jack!! I love you!!
Julie's childhood friend, Robbin
We have been spending so much time together, I have not had a second to update anything...or say thank you publically for the sweet, sweet words you have placed here on your blog!! You are so precious!! I cannot even tell you what it means to Jonny and I that you would write something so precious beyond words...and to know that you mean it with your whole heart!
We love you dearly, Jess!!
Can't wait to see you tomorrow!
Love you!
Julie
i was in mrs davis class a couple years ago so i wanted to let you know you have a beautiful son and wonderful parents that are adopting your son.
love
meg
Post a Comment